Ye Olde Enemies List

Since his announcement that he’s going to put together an enemies list, I suspect none too few smart asses have been emailing him asking for inclusion—which I think is just the funniest thing ever. How big a mockable, impotent pantload do you have to be for people to react to your announcement of an enemies list by sending emails requesting to be on it? Ha!

Earlier, I got cc’ed on an email to Blathero Bill, and I thought it might be funny to start collecting the emails and/or posts of people asking to be put on Ye Olde Enemies List. So here are a few to get started, and if you’ve got one you’d like me to post or link, let me know in comments or by email.

(And I see via Mannion that Earl has some ideas to help get yourself on Ye Olde Enemies List, too!)

Other blog entires: Agitprop, The Defeatists, Night Bird's Fountain, ReidBlog, Daily Pepper, Thoughts from an Empty Head, The Vitriolic Monkey, Archy, The One and Only Some Watery Tart, Whatever, Me4Pres, Expostulation, the Dark Wraith at Big Brass Blog, The Disgruntled Chemist, Official Reality Check.

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Dear Mr. O'Reilly:

I am kindly requesting you add my blog, Shakespeare's Sister, to your enemies list. Not only have I written about my disgust with your comments regarding offering up San Francisco to al-Qaida...here, here, and here…but I have been resolutely convinced you are an utter tool for quite some time now. If that doesn't qualify me, just let me know what I need to do. I don't want to miss my chance to be on the enemies list of the modern McCarthy!

If it helps convince you to include me, I'll even pretend to be scared when I find out I'm on the list. Maybe then you won't be deluged with requests to be on it, which is, you've got to admit, kind of sad.

Best regards,
Shakespeare's Sister

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Dear Mr. O'Reilly,

I'm not sure if you're taking submissions for your new "Enemies List" or not. If you are, could you please add my site, Two Glasses.

As you can see from my post the other day on your treasonous comments regarding San Francisco, my anti-O'Reilly credentials are impeccable.

Thanks, in advance, for your consideration.

Toast

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Sir:

Kindly add me to your enemies list, since I think you are a moneygrubbing, grandstanding piece of human waste who preys upon the ignorance of others for fun and profit. I know you're not nearly as stupid as your followers are, but that doesn't make what you do right. At least ignorance is rooted somewhere in innocence, whereas your brand of hate-filled lies contribute to that ignorance. It never ceases to amaze me how chickenhawks such as yourself can so readily beat the drum for war, and yet never once have you had the GUTS to even walk into a recruiting station and sign up, even in times of peace.

Before you say it, yes, I hate you. Years of watching this great nation (which I served in the military, by the way) decay because of hacks like you who call themselves journalists but whose only credentials are hatred and a healthy appreciation of the ignorance of their readers and listeners.

When you get to Hell, and by God, I'm certain you will, say hello to Adolf, GW, and all the Dicks (Cheney, Nixon, et al). If I get to my Judgment and am found lacking, I hope that at least I can spend all of eternity jabbing your sorry ass with a pitchfork.

Fuck you very much,
“Shaker Ben”

PS: If I am sent a single email by any of your fans I will forward it to Elliot Spitzer, Attorney General of New York State, and every single media outlet I can think of.

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