Broke Shit Mountain

So, this weekend, our ancient dishwasher and new stove broke.

Not new enough, though: Our warranty ran out October 17. *sad trombone* In good news, planned obsolescence is getting super awesome! Jeeves, call my broker and tell him to invest EVERYTHING in Obsoleticorp! BUY! BUY! BUY!

Anyway!

Yesterday, Iain and I went out to comparison shop new dishwashers. It was so much fun! (No, it wasn't.) And not just because of the salesman who was suffering from the misapprehension that my eyeballs are located in my boobs. (Really, sir, it is 2011.) And not just because of the self-directed disablism that was manifesting as guilt that a dishwasher is a necessity in our home because of my garbage back, which makes the stand-and-lean of sink-washing unbearably painful. (A ridiculous bit of judgment I would never direct at someone else, yet continue to direct at myself.)

Mostly it was fun (not fun) because every dishwasher looks the same to me. What does a $1,200 dishwasher do that a $300 dishwater can't? Does it put away the dishes when it's done? No? Well, the $300 model is looking pretty good then.

When we got home, our brains fried from investigating the virtually indistinguishable innards of nine thousand dishwashers, I figured Consumer Reports was our best hope. I paid the $26 for an annual subscription, which seemed like a decent investment to avoid potentially making a couple-hundred dollar mistake.

I clicked through to their dishwasher analysis. Its first line: "Almost all of the dishwashers we tested clean well and are easy to load." LOL. Of course they were.

We still haven't picked out a dishwasher.

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