Believe It Or Not

This is not from The Onion:



Nuts. Tongue-lashing. Full-throated. "Teabag Mouthpieces." "Teabagging in a nutshell." "Issued statements supporting teabagging, but is publicly tight-lipped." "Looking forward to an up-close and personal taste of teabagging themselves." "If you are planning simultaneous teabagging all around the country, you're going to need a Dick Armey."

And conservatives have no idea why the media, outside of Fox News, won't take their little protest seriously.

I don't know about you, but I'm totally looking forward to the teabagging festivities tomorrow. I just have to figure out what to wear. Something loose.

Edit: For those that can't view the video, it's an MSNBC story about the conservative "tea parties," and it's essentially all the jokes I listed above (and some in comments that I didn't list). Testicle humor! Haw, haw! Schuster also points out that the conservatives have no idea that they're getting the whole idea of the "tea party" completely ass-backwards, and "taxation without representation" does not equal "taxes are bad," which pleased me.

More Edit: Courtesy of smadin, a full transcript is below the fold. Put down your bevvies now.

For most Americans, Wednesday, April 15th will be tax day. But, in our fourth story tonight, it's gonna be teabagging day for the right-wing, and they're going nuts for it.
Thousands of them whipped out the festivities early this past weekend, and while the parties are officially toothless, the teabaggers are full-throated about their goals: they want to give President Obama a strong tongue-lashing, and lick government spending -- spending they did not oppose when they were under Presidents Bush and Reagan. They oppose Mr. Obama's tax rates, which will be lower for most of them, and they oppose the tax increases Mr. Obama is imposing on the rich, whose taxes will skyrocket to a rate about ten percent less than it was under Reagan. That's teabagging in a nutshell, taking its inspiration from the Boston Tea Party when colonists tossed British tea into the sea, because the tax on it had not been voted on by their own duly elected representatives.
That's exactly the opposite, of course, of today's taxes, known in some quarters as taxation with representation.
But as New York Times columnist Paul Krugman points out today, this time the teabagging is not a spontaneous uprising: the people who came up with it are a familiar circle of Republicans, including former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, and former House Majority Leader Dick Armey, both of whom have firm support from right-wing financiers and lobbyists, as well as Washington prostitute patron David Vitter, who has issued statements in support of teabagging but is publicly tight-lipped.
Then there is the media, specifically the Fox News Channel, including Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity. Both are looking forward to an up close and personal taste of teabagging themselves at events this Wednesday. But most amusing of all, is Neil Cavuto, a member of the network's Executive Committee. Neil's online bio says he joined the network in July of 1996, three months before the Fox News Channel went on the air. Cavuto, defending his network's promotion of teabagging said, quote, "We are going to be right in the middle of these [teabaggers becase at Fox we do not pick and choose the protests. We were there for the Million Man March." Can we roll that footage, the Fox News coverage of the Million Man March, back in October of '95?
[blank, black screen with caption at the top: "Courtesy Fox News Channel / Oct 16, 1995"]
Of course, the Million Man March occurred, as newshounds.org points out, almost a year before Fox News was on the air. We can only speculate why widespread teabagging made Cavuto think of the Million Man March, unless he got them confused with Dick Armey. And in Cavuto's defense, if you are planning simultaneous teabagging all around the country, you're gonna need a Dick Armey.

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