The first rule of Marriage Club is...

...until anybody can get married, nobody should get married.

NEW YORK - Brad Pitt, ever the social activist, says he won't be marrying Angelina Jolie until the restrictions on who can marry whom are dropped.

"Angie and I will consider tying the knot when everyone else in the country who wants to be married is legally able," the 42-year-old actor reveals in Esquire magazine's October issue, on newsstands Sept. 19.

I don't usually go in for celebrity protests. I respect people who are willing to use their fame to promote the causes they support, but that doesn't mean I'll follow blindly just because the star of my favorite movie believes I should be far more worried about the speckled owl than I currently am.

But this... this is pretty cool. Oh, sure, it's a celebrity marriage he's postponing, and those have a half-life of the time it takes you to get to the supermarket and buy a tabloid (man, Nicole Ritchie is scary thin these days), but Pitt has always struck me as having an impressive level of sincerity, as well as excellent taste in film roles. And women.

Even more than that, though, is that the idea itself really appeals to me. Now, I'm single right now, so I can't exactly participate; but wouldn't it be cool if people just started boycotting marriage? Not everybody would get into it, but there have to be at least some decent-minded people in this country who could delay their turn at the altar until the act meant a little more than simply raising exclusion levels. ("Ha-ha! Our love is soooooo totally recognized by the government! That's right- our mass murdering, sociopathic toadstool of a Fearless Leader? He knows about Timmy and me, and he says we're better than you and Linda, Susan.") Couples who were engaged, instead of buying wedding rings, could wear rainbow armbands. Instead of renting The Wedding Singer, we could read a book instead.

Joking aside, I ask any pre-nuptials out there to follow Pitt's example. You can accuse me of insenstivity if you like, but if marriage is an official proof of love, and not everyone who loves can marry, what the fuck are you on about?