What a Class Act

Did you hear? Mary Cheney has a book out. Apparently, it's all about being the daughter of Dick Cheney, Grand Poobah of the biggest homo-hatin' party on the planet, while happening to be a great big lesbian.

Ho Fucking Hum.

WASHINGTON - Throughout the last U.S. presidential election, Mary Cheney was known to American voters simply as Vice-President Dick Cheney's quiet gay daughter.

No more.

Dum-dum-DUMMMMMMMMM!! Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy ride! Oh, I do hope my heart will be able to take this! After all, Mary has been such a vocal, in-your-face personality in the past!

In a memoir published Tuesday, the 37-year-old lesbian describes a proposed constitutional ban on same-sex marriage as a "gross affront'' to gay Americans and reveals she almost quit the Republican campaign after President George W. Bush's endorsement of the legislation two years ago.

Yeah, great. You know something, Mary? "Almost" only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. I guess a big fat Republican paycheck your loyalty to your father must really be strong.

I love how she's referred to as "the 37-year-old lesbian." Did you hear? Mary Cheney is a lesbian! Lesbian lesbian lesbian. Shout it from the rooftops! Unless you're John Kerry or John Edwards, of course. Then you're a big pile of poo.

But Cheney saves her harshest words for Bush's 2004 opponents, calling Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry a "son of a bitch'' and his running mate, John Edwards, a "total slime'' for discussing her sexual orientation during nationally televised debates during the campaign.

Yeah! Because it's nobody's business but her own! At least until she gets a sweet book deal out of it!

Jesus, are we still beating this ridiculous drum? The comment about Mary Cheney may have been a little low, but this wasn't news; if you ask me, it gave Darth Cheney a chance to look almost human during the VP debate. The only reason they all got their knickers in a twist was because it may have made them look bad to the base.

The 239-page autobiography has vaulted the publicity-shy political operative back into the Washington spotlight she's already appeared in a prime-time interview with ABC's Diane Sawyer and provoked mixed reviews from gay rights activists who are bracing for a Senate vote next month on the Republican-sponsored gay-marriage ban.

Publicity shy. Until the book deal came through. Until she didn't have to worry about Daddy getting back into office. This coy "publicity shy" bullshit completely avoids how her election-friendly silence harmed gays and lesbians during the 2004 election. Pam:

The more I read, the less regard I have for Ms. Cheney. I had little to begin with, but she has not impressed me at all as someone who has any empathy for those who risk losing their jobs, custody of children, even their safety, simply because they are gay. Now that it's "her turn" to talk, she's digging the hole deeper.

If Mary's stance is truly 'Can we talk about something else already?' that really does say it all. I hope she understands that, as a resident of Virginia, she is about to watch her state vote this fall on passage of a heinous marriage amendment which would legally attack her relationship with Heather Poe. Would she rather talk about kayaking down the river with Poe, or might she step up to the plate as a resident of the Commonwealth and say that this amendment is wrong, no matter which party you belong to? If she did so, then I might revisit my opinion of her. I doubt she'll do anything of the sort.

She really is clueless (and uncaring) about the impact her silence in 2004 had on gays and lesbians who lived day to day, watching those red states pass marriage amendments, then made moves to stop gay adoption, all as she lived and worked in the safety and financial comfort that her father's status provided. It was easier not to say a word, not to give a damn, than to challenge the right wing nutcases as they demonized gays and lesbians to stir up The Base.

Pam also points out how AOL (her employer) is about to lay off 9% of it's workforce, but Mary has nothing to worry about. Just another reminder: if your last name is "Bush" or "Cheney," you're set for life.

Cheney became a flashpoint for both sides in America's culture wars during the 2004 campaign after Bush endorsed the constitutional ban to shore up political support on the religious right.

Cheney, who served as director of her father's re-election campaign, stayed silent when Aravosis launched a controversial Internet campaign DearMary.com pleading with her to denounce Bush.

She stayed silent when Kerry, during a debate with Bush, responded to a question on whether homosexuality was a choice by telling the nation Dick Cheney had a daughter "who is a lesbian.''

And she bit her tongue when a Republican Senate candidate, Alan Keyes, accused her of ``selfish hedonism'' for living a homosexual lifestyle.

But in her book, Cheney reveals she refused to attend Bush's 2004 State of the Union address after reading a draft copy of the speech that spoke of the need to defend the sanctity of marriage.

Gee. How brave of you. Protest Bush's disgusting actions against LGBTs... against you, by slipping even further into the shadows. You did nothing. Bravo.

When Bush later endorsed a constitutional amendment to expressly forbid gay marriage, Cheney "seriously considered packing up my office and heading home'' to the house she shared in Colorado with her longtime partner, Heather Poe.

It "gave me a knot in the pit of my stomach to think of my candidate for president endorsing the federal marriage amendment,'' she writes.

The gay marriage ban "would write discrimination into the constitution, our nation's most important and influential document,'' Cheney says in the book. "It is fundamentally wrong and a gross affront to gays and lesbians everywhere.''

And yet you did nothing. Again, bravo.

Cheney is less generous to Kerry and Edwards, who she accuses of "sleazy'' politics for mentioning she was gay during debates with Bush and her father.

"John Kerry didn't 'out me', nor did he offend or attack me by calling me a lesbian. It wasn't a secret that I was gay, and I certainly couldn't be offended by the truth,'' she writes. ``What was offensive E was that he was obviously trying to use me and my sexual orientation for his own political gain.''

Much like your father and his boss were ignoring and/or hiding it for their own political gain? Much like your father and his boss were using Kerry's words and your homosexuality against him after he made the comment for their own political gain?

Oh, sorry Mary, I forgot that IOKIYAR.

Sitting in the studio audience when Edwards mentioned her sexual orientation, Cheney said she looked at the vice-presidential candidate and mouthed the words"Go F*** Yourself'' a phrase her father had earlier employed against Democratic Senator Patrick Leahy.

Ahhh. How sweet. Like father, like daughter. Doesn't that just warm your heart?

Cheney's book is being released in advance of a planned June 5 Senate vote on the gay-marriage ban.

The measure is being opposed by several Republicans notably Senator John McCain, a potential 2008 presidential candidate but could help bolster the party's right-wing base before this year's mid-term elections.

A group of gay Republican activists, the Log Cabin Republicans, said Cheney's outspoken opposition could help defeat the proposed ban.

What outspoken opposition? This years too-late book? Don't make me laugh.

"Cheney's voice as the daughter of the vice-president is especially welcome as members (of Congress) debate a constitutional amendment aimed at marginalizing all gay and lesbian families,'' said Patrick Guerriero, president of the group.

"Mary Cheney's conservative voice can help remind loyal Republicans this proposal violates basic conservative principles.''

So, what, now Mary Fucking Cheney is the hero of the Gay Marriage Rights movement? No, sorry, that dog won't hunt, monsignor. This is going to do nothing to change the minds of "loyal Republicans." It's the "loyal Republicans" that want this proposal in the first place, you Log-Headed morons. The Republican party has worked systematically to build up a "base" of lockstep-marching, frothing homophobics that don't give a good goddamn if LGBTs are maginalized. An Anti-Gay Constitutional Amendment IS a "basic conservative principle." This is exactly why no one understands you, Log Cabiners: your loyalty lies with a group of people that venomously hate you.

This book is written for and speaks to exactly one person: Mary Cheney.

Other long-time gay rights activists were less enthused about Cheney's entry into the debate.

"So she is a lesbian who came out against the federal marriage amendment big deal. Am I supposed to be grateful?'' asked Robin Tyler, executive director of Equality Campaign. "She can't be cast as a gay saviour. She could have had the principle to withdraw from her father's campaign two years ago. Frankly, Mary Cheney still embarrasses me.''

Bingo.

More at Pam's Place. Bolds mine. Weird editing errors in the original story theirs.

(Sunshine came softly through my cross-post today...)