Laura Bush gets ready to punch Christmas in the face.

MRS. BUSH: Well, all things bright and beautiful is the theme this year. I think it will be really bright and beautiful with this fabulous tree. But thank you all very much. Happy holidays. I know this is the real start of the season, the Monday after Thanksgiving, and so I want to wish everybody happy holidays. And we'll see you later this week with the White House decorations...

Next thing you know, Bill O’Reilly will invite her on his show—and she won’t go, the coward!

Full transcript at WhiteHouse.gov. Hat tip C&L.